It's another Christmas Eve; so many have passed through my life now. I'm watching the "Hallmark Channel" and all their lovely, happily ever after movies.......in my living room; by myself.
I've spent many years alone now during the holidays, even though my husband is here; he has been sleeping for hours now. There are no lights outside, making things bright on my condo; their are no presents under the tree this year, there is no mistletoe, no kisses, there is no passion to spark my eyes..........just a beautiful tree; given to me by a wonderful Christmas angel.
I miss the Christmas's when I was in love, held hands, stole kisses, went to midnight mass with that "someone special", woke up next to him; and saw love reflected in his eyes, a look that made me melt. I miss being hugged so tight my ribs hurt and not wanting it to stop.
But that stopped many, many holidays ago.....I'm 63 now; and haven't had that for over 25 years. Like John Lennon said "Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans"........and my life changed into "lonely".
I'm so lonely, so very lonely..............
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